![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
"Hi, you've reached the cell phone for Tim Laughlin, Assistant to the President. Please leave a detailed message, a phone number with which I can reach you, and I'll return your call as soon as possible. Have a wonderful day."
THE PRESIDENT ♚"but finding new ways to hurt you is always so pretty to me, little prince. "WHAT WENT WRONG
► adopted
► joined military
► had sex with sister
► rejected proposal
► met an old sorcerer
► became president
► rejected proposal x2
► dead wife
► does not own any cowsRED FLAGS
► incest
► trained dom daddy
► safewords not required
► only eats unseasoned chicken
► gray bedsheetsGREEN FLAGS
► democrat but better
► old romantic
► likes books
► oral sex
► literally king arthur
Edited 2024-01-30 13:33 (UTC)
i was trying to to be nice, but since you mentioned it, i have an album on my phone called "embry's ass dimples" and tmz on my contacts list.
you need to be my date. don't be cute about it. sober, combed hair, and anything but another tom ford suit.
you need to be my date. don't be cute about it. sober, combed hair, and anything but another tom ford suit.
all the dior in the world can't buy you class. you know how many people would be happy to see my ass dimples?
are you planning on wearing a paper bag over your head during this favor?
don't call it that. you can be my dateless plus one to whatever reptile gathering you have on your calendar.
are you planning on wearing a paper bag over your head during this favor?
don't call it that. you can be my dateless plus one to whatever reptile gathering you have on your calendar.
you know how many people have already seen them, whore?
you're my plus one. don't get confused. and i'm only bringing you because you're the vice president and semi-decent to look at.
you're my plus one. don't get confused. and i'm only bringing you because you're the vice president and semi-decent to look at.
are we sure you're not a full blown homosexual?
if that was agreeable you fooled me.
and a house party in the hamptons. for a governor. moore, if you've heard of her.
if that was agreeable you fooled me.
and a house party in the hamptons. for a governor. moore, if you've heard of her.
questioning my bisexuality because i specifically don't want to see your vagina is textbook narcissism.
wait, this is our mother's hampton house party? why am i your plus one? why didn't i get a personal invitation to decline?
you can take my aide as a date.
wait, this is our mother's hampton house party? why am i your plus one? why didn't i get a personal invitation to decline?
you can take my aide as a date.
well, it is a top notch snatch. if you were wondering.
because i'm bringing you. you, not your aide. family. i'll tell him to book your ticket, bubby wubby.
because i'm bringing you. you, not your aide. family. i'll tell him to book your ticket, bubby wubby.
thank god.
embry. i'm not bringing some little fucktoy you bark around. no one wants to see him.
i'm bringing you. my extremely annoying and yet undeniably charming stepbrother. i'm bringing you so i don't need to find a date, because i don't want to find a date.
the whole family is going. i mean everyone.
embry. i'm not bringing some little fucktoy you bark around. no one wants to see him.
i'm bringing you. my extremely annoying and yet undeniably charming stepbrother. i'm bringing you so i don't need to find a date, because i don't want to find a date.
the whole family is going. i mean everyone.
calm down, sissy. he's actually kind of like you, in that i think maybe he belongs in prison but i can't prove it.
finally giving up on anyone loving you?
what kind of house party is this? i know i didn't miss mom's birthday. are you pregnant again? aren't you a little old for that?
finally giving up on anyone loving you?
what kind of house party is this? i know i didn't miss mom's birthday. are you pregnant again? aren't you a little old for that?
great. you're being an asshole right now, so you cant make it up to me by showing up for once.
AIDE TO THE VICE PRESIDENT ♜"your honor, i stand before you accused of being sweet."WHAT WENT WRONG
► homophobic father
► caught giving his tennis bf a blowie by above
► got tennis bf killed by following him into the army
► unofficially adopted/mentored by senator smith
► senator smith killed himself after son lenny was outedRED FLAGS
► republican
► deeply closeted homosexual
► high functioning alcoholic
► smoker
► emotionally unavailable
► untrained one-off dom daddy extraordinaire
► can pass a lie detector test with flying colors
► knows where all the bodies are buried bc he buried them
► broke tim laughlin's heartGREEN FLAGS
► war hero
► speaks 3 languages
► solid political network + plenty of favors to call in
► wickedly charming + stunningly good-looking
► good taste in scotch, cars, clothes + pretty brunette boys
► excellent gift-giver
► knows where all the bodies are buried bc he buried them
Edited 2024-01-30 05:26 (UTC)
( 💁♀️ )
fine.
make sure the swimsuit you bring isn't too gay, or senator wilde will feel you up. again. his pinching has only gotten meaner since he's gotten older.
fine.
make sure the swimsuit you bring isn't too gay, or senator wilde will feel you up. again. his pinching has only gotten meaner since he's gotten older.
yes mr. vice president.
can't be any bigger than childbirth, if you feel like bringing that up again.
can't be any bigger than childbirth, if you feel like bringing that up again.
Page 1 of 11